Cellular Memory and Starvation?

I found it really interesting how enjoyable it was to make my husband's bacon, egg and toast breakfast this morning. He eats cheerios on the weekdays but on weekends, it is our habit to eat together and I usually make eggs or whole grain french toast.

I didn't taste any of the food or even want to lick the butter off my fingers. It just seemed comforting to smell the food cooking. I even found myself purposefully taking big sniffs. It seems to make the road I'm temporarily on much less bleak and long.

We carry our ancestors in our genes to one degree or another. They live within our tissues. People who receive heart transplants sometimes even seem to inherit the memories of the donor!

.I wonder if  by cutting calories so drastically, I activate some gene expression that "remembers" a period of real starvation. Smelling the food, I feel contented, reminding my body that I am cutting my calories by choice, that food is plentiful and readily available should I change my mind. I'm not actually in a prison, concentration camp or languishing during a plague or famine. I'm living amidst plenty of plenty -- so much that so that it was easy as apple pie to get fat. 

SATURDAY MORNING - MILK DAY 2

I've spoken with my counselor and she assures me this is NOT a starvation diet. The reason is, because of the acupressure beads manipulating the hypothalamus gland, the body does not slow it's metabolism, nor eat up your muscle or organ tissue for breakfast. People retain their muscles mass, which is why so many look toned as they lose, rather than really saggy and baggy. Though I'm sure those that are losing in the range of 60-100 pounds or more do have pockets of droopy skin to deal with.  She told me many doctors have done this diet just to see how it works, after their patients come in minus the weight they've carried for years. And all the numbers get better -- triglycerides, cholesterol, even hypothyroid people improve. That's the only medication I take (thyroid)  --don't believe statin drugs are safe, nor do I trust the pharmaceutical supported research that says it "works." Did you know that lots  of research shows that women with higher cholesterol levels live the longest? Dont' believe me --read The Cholesterol Myth, or go to www.westonaprice.org and check out their cholesterol writings. My Dad had very low cholesterol which is associated with depression and cancer, both of which he suffered with. He died of bladder cancer at age 69.

Got up this Saturday at 5 and wasn't feeling quite as good as yesterday-- did a yoga and chi gong tape, with LEE HOLDEN (he's great!) some gardening and it was still 6 hours till LUNCH.  (A glass of milk in some shape or form.)  Today the hunger pangs are evident despite massaging the acupressure beads diligently. Though they do come and go and maybe I haven't been drinking quite enough water? I've read on the List Serve that people lose the most after milk days.. I can see why.

I did  lose another pound......and a few ounces.  190.4 this morning.
When I look in the mirror, I can really see it in my face and my stomach.
That's what keeps people doing this particular diet -- the rewards are there and they are highly motivating.

My granddaughter and my sister are coming today and both will spend the night. Got to get ready!
kinda wish this was a veggie/fruit day so I could eat more normally in the afternoon. On well, I think lunch will be a mocha shake...with lots of ice in the milk and coffee and  WF choc syrup..and hour and a half till Lunch time.

BTW, if you're interested in researching the diet plan, go to www.accudiet.com or www.beaddiet.com
Don't believe what you read on review websites. I found a couple and they turned out to be highly inaccurate as to what this diet program entails.

Cinderella better get her ass home before 10 PM!

I was feeling so good last night, after my bowl of garlic,onion, milk soup and dessert of  yoghurt favored with raspberry WF jam, that I decided I could do a "night on the town." A middle-aged male band that I know was playing at a bar about 30 minutes away. My husband wasn't game so I took a girlfriend over. The band was a lot better than their sound system, but we were definitely invading somebody's personal "Cheers." -- this was a biker and tatto bar and the smoke was as thick as I been in in YEARS. Good thing hubby did not come, at my bidding, because he can't stand smoke. I can tolerate it, having been a smoker in the past. But it was irritating to know my clothes were soaking it up and that I'd walk in the door at home smelling like I'd been cuddling up with Marlboro Man.

Any way, After an hour I had a diet coke and then we decided to call it quits. The band started at 9 - the usual around here. (How I love the sanity of English Pubs that play music starting at 7 and you can go home by 9. In fact on weekdays, they offten CLOSE then, so nobody has trouble getting up in the morning for work, or has a hangover!)

Anyway, by 10:30 on the ride home, I started to feel lousy -- my stomach was talking back to me and I felt queasy and had a slight headache, maybe it was the smoke?  -and it occured to me that I could have read myself to sleep by now, had I been home, and missed this particular nauseating feeling.

MEMO TO SELF: Cinderella of the Last Diet-- get thee to your Pumpkin Chariot and get your butt home before the clock chimes 10 next time!

EMERGENCY! Life is a box of (Fattening) chocolates, you never know what yur gonna get

You might assume that I did a drive by at a Josh Early's and got sucked out of my car window by the smells of chocolate turtles or cherry cordials. But that's not the case. I was happily out pruning my bushes again, and making veggie stock on my stove when I got a phone call from my eldest son. Seems he's just about  severed his finger and he was at the emergency ward --and wanted some support. So I turned off the stock, locked the doors and poured one cup of whole milk in a thermos and took off -- he's a half hour away and I figured I better be prepared.

Now, he's okay - though brooding over the loss -- he can't play ball for two weeks. The doc put 12 stitches in his finger and glued his nail back on. He has a fracture but he didn't sever any muscles or tendons. ( he's not a kid, he's over 30.) So I took him to his car and told him I needed to get home to try out my ice-cream. He noticed that I was thinner!  But only for second-- he was deep into his own problems of the moment.

Sooooo. The cool thing is that yesterday I was wondering if I could handle having my granddaughter over while on this diet. She's still a terrible 2 and requires a lot of attention. Plus, just last night I was brooding that I could take the food stuff, but I could not handle not feeling good - and that I wanted to feel as good as I did before I started this damn diet (mood) - as good as I felt driving to Boston and back my myself last weekend, singing away with my Across the Universe CD. And you know what? There I was, post emergency room, riding along in my car, singing away. I"d had 1 cup of milk in the last 18 hours and I wasn't a bit hungry. I felt great.

In fact, while gardening, I felt so good that I started fooling around, not just with weeding and pruning, but with the more creative aspects of my garden - the little things I place around for more ambiance. I hadn't felt like doing  that for two years -- that's a real sign of feeling very, very good, of feeling expansive and on automatic "humnnnn." Cool.

The hard part was going inside and gettingthe  ice milk out-- which was hard as a rock. I had to microwave it to get a spoon into it and it was grainy and really didn't taste that good. While trying to work with it, I became a bit anxious and shaky as my mind flew to such questions as "Is this all I get to eat today?" or "What do I crunch on?"  or "2 1/2 cups? That's it? What will I do at dinner?" etc. etc.  My mind was making me shake, not my body. My body was having a fine time gardening and driving and going to the emergency ward. It's the mind-body-food connection that's tripping me up.

But I think I can deal with it. I took a sip of plain, fresh milk. Hey this is raw milk with lots of fat and enzymes and I don't want to waste the value of that with a microwave or even a 0 calorie chocolate, I realized.  I went back out to garden, I strained my stock and took the veggies to the compost heap. And I made chili for my husband's dinner. Not a bad day. And I hear you lose even more weight after Milk days...

I found a recipe for garlic soup on the web-- just milk, garlic, onion, xantham gum and a spice or two. That will be dinner, with some decaf and milk, perhaps. and a popsicle made from zevia rootbeer. I can handle that.

I'm getting in the groove and I can already feel my knees thanking me.

I've Got Milk!

First things first. I dropped another pound. Second, I woke up feeling fine, without any shakiness or weird feelings and (maybe because I took an aleve for muscle pain after working in the yard for 2 hours yesterday) I didn't have to get up in the middle of the night to pee -not once!  (Unless I got up and a can't remember! LOL)  Third, I went to my stash of summer shorts that were relegated to the "can't button these" pile and put a pair on. They buttoned easily and I'm sitting here with them on, without feeling like the waistband is going to give me reflux!  How cool is that? Way cool, way cool.

Last night I made spaghetti squash with tomato sauce (homemade, no oil) for dinner. I felt normal satiation for the first time in 2 days. Maybe it was the familiarity of the sauce. My taste buds were really happy, even without the Romano.

I ate less than the 1  and 1/2 pounds of veggies allowed for the day. It's true, you just can't force yourself to eat more raw veggies when you feel full. I added half an avocado (now that I know I've got plenty of ounces to spare) to my lunchtime salad and that tasted great-- the creamy texture felt like a thick dressing. And I made a smaller bowl, so there was nothing left over for Puppy! LOL--okay, I tossed her a few pieces of romaine.

Puppy seems to be aware that I am doing something different. I wonder if my body is eeking out stinky detoxing smells that only a dog can pick up.  The night before last, she actually went into my husbands bedroom and got up on his bed to sleep. This is UNHEARD of. (I snore, we sleep separately, end of story.)  If dogs can alert you to an epileptic attack or can smell cancer --they must be able to smell toxic fat coming through your pores!

Last night I almost lost it. We went to an IRON PIGS game and I took my can of Zevia for comfort. But it seemed that everyone around me was out to sabotage my diet. French fries, funnel cake, hot dogs, port barbecue, popcorn - you name it, someone was eating it within 15 feet of me. Can you imagine the smells?
But the other thing I noticed? Living in funnel cake country, I've become somewhat immune to how overweight MANY people are, including myself.  Last night it was blatantly obvious. Studies have been done that show that body weight is highly related to the people who surround you --in other words, you are influenced by how others look and eat - and you tend to become the same. My husband got a soda, a pack of red licorice and a large pretzel -- surprising because we actually don't usually eat  at games. I asked him what was up and he said, "Two hamburgers (what he had for dinner) is not a very filling dinner." I responded with a touch of delirium--" A half  a pound of burger, two rolls, a piece of cheese and ketchup are not filling???? Then he said, "I guess I'm eating for you!"  LOL! I hope this diet plan isn't dangerous to his health! If  I lose 30, he'll gain 30?!!But I also promised myself I would do my very best not to make one more comment on his eating habits while I adjust mine. It's a very bad idea to get in that kind of a critical mode. You do what you do. If others want to follow, fine. If not, they aren't ready. Period.

Today is the start of the 2 day milk protocol. 20 ounces of milk between 12 and 6 PM. You can add Zero calorie syrups and make shakes and ice cream. I've got Walden Farms chocolate and maple syrups all lined up and I made the ice cream from raw whole milk two days ago. I also bought Walden Farms marshmallow fluff, peanut butter and raspberry jam. HA! 20 ounces of milk (2 1/2 cups) does not seem like anything close to a pound and a half of veggies and 2 fruits, so I guess I was getting nervous when I bought those things. My counselor assures me that once the acupressure beads kick in fully, I may not even want that much...hmmm. That's an interesting thought.

I plan to do more yard work on this beautiful, sunny day. Being outside and working in my garden feels highly therapeutic. I'm engaged, moving, not sweating too much, (Which would mean losing water and possibly disturbing my electrolyte balance) enjoying the sights, smells and sounds and I'm still near a bathroom and a pitcher of water. Yesterday I consumed the 11 -12 glasses of water; the recommended one half your body weight in ounces. My bladder is wondering if I'm trying to put out a fire. 

The Listserve support group I have access to as part of this plan has been helpful- but it also contains pitfalls for beginners, I think. There are people who have been very successful who cheer you on and have a wealth of recipe tips. And there are people who haven't done so well, who are basically whining and crying about it. Reading their posts can be unnerving, so I decided I would avoid them. There are stages of change: Precontemplation, Contemplation, Action and Maintenance. The whining people are still in Contemplation phase, trying to do the diet. They're not committed. Been there. Its a very frustration phase. I feel committed. That's why I could go to someones house and watch them eat dinner and be perfectly happy with a glass of ice water and the conversation. Blessed Be.

And a chocolate, peanut butter, marshmallow sundae at noon.

Alive and kicking

I woke up at 4 AM - not that unusual, but I felt kind of crappy - sort of an inner shakiness. I decided not to stay in bed and stew about it so I got up, had 2 cups of cold water and put in the Dirty Dancing DVD workout that just came in the mail. I made some passion fruit tea, with a tsp of raw honey (you're allowed to have that if you feel lightheaded -- or before you exercise, and I did a 30 minute warm up routine where they teach you a bunch of dance steps. The concentration did the trick (and maybe the tea) and I felt much better. I"m nursing a broken ankle back to health, so I was very careful.

At 5 my husband gets up and I make his lunch. Today it's BLT, so I'm smelling bacon and cutting up watermelon, putting pretzels in a baggy and cherries in a cup. Believe it or not, this is okay with me. I do this every week day and I'm used to not eating or picking at the food too much -- okay the fruit, usually.. To be honest, its nice to smell the food-- I love smells - they are very satisfying.  Last night I watched two people eat a great smelling, garlicky shrimp and chicken dish while I drank ice water. They kept asking me if I wanted a a little bit (knowing I was dieting)  but I said no and I was fine. Conversation was enough. And the food smelled great- like a perfume. You don't eat perfume, right?

It's now almost 8 AM, I have had 4 glasses of cold water and a cup of hot tea and I've got 4 more hours till I can eat my veggies and fruit. Maybe I should go back to bed!!

No, this is always a productive part of my day and I've often gotten busy and forgotten to eat till lunch time --- well -not OFTEN, but it happens and I'm not aware of suffering. Of course, right now I'm detoxing so that's a little different, but I think I will go take the dog for a leisurely walk around the park and pull some weeds. Then get to work. (I'm a writer)

I was surprised to see that I dropped 2 pounds. 192.6.
 Now that's my Set point weight. I go over that and under that very occasionally and my weight comes back to 192 -- for the last 17 years, about. Actually for the last year or so its been stuck more like 194. Recently I broke my ankle and had some oral surgery that caused a lot of residual pain -- I couldn't move much and I stuffed a lot of sugary comfort foods down my throat. I gained about 8 pounds. That is now gone (I did Atkins for 10 days before starting this protocol.) This is where the rubber hits the road. Going below 192 has always been hard, 10 years ago,  I lost 10 pounds and got down to 182 for my HS reunion --through very vigorous exercise, heavy weight lifting and a the "Body For Life" diet plan. But I hurt my back doing the heavy weights and after the reunion my resolve fell apart.  Other than that, I can't remember losing more than a pound or two no matter what I've done -- counted calories, exercised every day, followed the Peanut Butter Diet or the Coconut Diet -- you get the picture. Here I am. The Last Diet.

My phone counselor told me that a lot of people she works with enter into The Biggest Loser challenges at their workplace. She says if they do this diet correctly, they always win. I like that idea -- and they don't even do coffee enemas or fracture their shin bones working out, like folks on the show. Lots of people on the biggest loser gain the weight back. They just can't keep up that kind of grueling exercise when they get home.

My Dog Ate My Salad

I know, it sounds too ridiculous to be true. After carefully measuring and weighing out 12 ounces of salad stuff, I found I could only eat about half and realized I could stop eating and have the rest later. I left the room for minute --salad bowl open--and as usual got distracted. When I came back I saw zucchini and portobello mushrooms on on the floor, the rejects from my cock-a-poo's mad cache and dash!  She ate the grated carrot, the romaine lettuce and the cauliflower.  So......now I don't know exactly how much I ate. There are 2.3 ounces left. LOL!!!  (Or should I be crying? I'm a little lightheaded right now)  I guess I can fake it for the rest of the day...but it certainly threw me a curve ball. Live. And Learn.

The good news is that while searching beneath the potholders and towels for the Popsicle maker (Made Zevia Ginger Beer Popsicles anticipating the 93 degree weather on Saturday) I found all kinds of great kitchen gadgets I'd relegated to that netherworld of seldom used stuff. I didn't know that my Pampered Chef cheese grater could shred carrots! Yippee. I was looking for something better than my mandolin, which shreds my knuckles.

I also found a P.C. ripple cutter, a knife sharpener and the rest of the Popsicle sticks. I hung a heart shaped cookie cuter  on a refrigerator magnet next to the sign that says, "Nothing Tastes as Good as Thin Feels." -- we'll see about that.

I spent time neatly arranging some of my stash in a seldom used Pampered Chef crudites "thingy" --I know I often forget about veggies and fruits in the vegetable bins until they've shriveled up or gotten slimy. But not now! I also took the raw milk and yogurt and made two batches of ice milk/yogurt with my Oprah induced purchase of a bright red Ice Cream maker that I bought, used about 3 times and then stuffed in the back of a cupboard. I still works as well as it did-- stuff sticks to the inside and it's very hard to get out, but I made an effort, waiting till that part melted and put up two ice milks in the fridge for milk days-- chocolate and maple. (Walden farms 0 calorie syrups)

I have a belated birthday date tonight-- my friend wanted to know what she could make me for dinner! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  I told her not to worry about it -- a diet coke would be fine. If I was hungry, I'd bring something....

OK--gotta pee....AGAIN.